#Legend Of The Seeker Stream Serial Killer Working#

It had been a long night of rare sensations experienced.She knew she was evil, and deserved to be violated in such a brutal fashion. Either Terry Goodkind dealt with depression and that is how he is inside my mind,В we didВ a Vulcan mind meld, or there is some other factor I am not considering.Book quotes I identify with (All from Faith of the Fallen by Terry Goodkind)вЂњThe pillows were stained with her blood. But bursting out , like a stream in the clear places , with an enlivening.

For the moment, that deep dark place within came close to being sated.вЂќ P. That was why she deserved to suffer whatever he did to her. That, she knew, was pure evil. Jagang erred in simple matters of the flesh, and that could only be expected вЂ“ all people were corrupt in the flesh вЂ“ but because of her indifference to the suffering around her, she failed in matters of the spirit.

289I donвЂ™t believe in religious salvation through good works. ItвЂ™s the only true good a person can do.вЂќ P. 211-212вЂњHelping others is the only way to prove your soulвЂ™s value. The Creator brought you into this world for no reason but to ease the misery of others, and here you bring only hurtвЂ™вЂ¦That was when Nicci had first learned that she bore the indelible stain of some shadowy, nameless, unconfessed evil.вЂќ P. 287вЂњвЂThat is all you bring to others: insufferable pain.

In fact, in regards to other people, obligation maybe too strong a word. I would not condemn someone for enjoying the spoils of their work. I donвЂ™t think the government has a right to force people to help others, but I believe people who are given more (intelligence, wealth, etc) are morally obligated to help others who cannot help themselves. 342Yep, IвЂ™ve thought this as well. Since she had ability, it was only right that she use it to help those in need.вЂќ P.

For example, if I go back to Wal-Mart and work as a cashier forever I am bad. Since wanton waste is bad, spending my life doing something that does not utilize my capability to help others, makes me worthless. Failing to do something good for others is a waste of my intelligence.

That doesnвЂ™t mean s/he can never take a vacation or relax or even that s/he must spend 80 hours/week performing surgery. I think s/he has a moral obligation to work as long as they are able andВ to attempt to teach someone else to do the surgery. Here is an interesting thought exercise from one of my undergrad classes: Does a heart surgeon who is the only one in the world who can perform a certain life saving surgery for sick kids have the right to retire early? If s/he retires early, all the children currently dying of X disease will die and every child born with X disease in the future will die, unless and until some other capable person is trained.

Therefore, if I truly believed letting someone die was the same as killing them, I would believe we could create laws forcing gifted people in certain areas like medicineВ to work until they were not longer able.вЂњNicciвЂ™s safety with him вЂ“ such as it was вЂ“ lay in her very indifference to her safety. I believe we can enact laws such as punishment for murder. Well, not identical, because if it was identical in my mind I would think society could force him/her to continue working. However, if I had the ability, I would not retire until I was incapable of performing the surgery because letting someone die if you can save them is the same as killing them in my book. S/he is an independent individual and ought to be allowed to make their own choices, no matter what I or anyone else thinks.

In the past, IвЂ™ve considered not having children because it seems cruel to bring a soul into this world that is filled with so much pain. For example, she told Richard that the world of life is wrong and that is why the Keeper wants to destroy all life. Plus, even if I did decide that was the right path (which I never ever would), in real life I donвЂ™t have the power to do what she did.Nonetheless,В it is weird. I have zero intention of that. 398It was scary to realize IвЂ™ve had similar thoughts to the ones that she used to justify trying to end all life.

This fictional character was on the same path I am on. It is as if she is inside my mind. My emotions are safer directed at me.I identify with her so much.

I know they can have self-control. What if there is another side of it already inside? What if I become a switch?I know sadists are not evil. Would I become a different kind of crazy? Would I be a mean person? Dishonest? Would I hurt others? IвЂ™m afraid of the darkness inside me. Honestly, in the past, I worried what would happen if I didnвЂ™t turn my emotions inward. Somehow she went from wanting to help other people, to wanting to kill other people to save them the suffering.Obviously, I realize she is a fictional character, but her mindset and thoughts are identical to mine.

Legend Of The Seeker Stream Serial Killer Working

*Note: I am not delusional. Personally, IвЂ™ve never felt a sadistic urge, but what if, like Nicci, the monster inside me can be turned? Maybe that is why I want people to torture me, maybe somehow I know keeping the darkness sated through masochism will keep everyone safe.Darn, this is becoming an existential issue! More than just BDSM it seemsвЂ¦.IвЂ™m one step closer to becoming a supernatural serial killer working for the devil. If I were on the other sideвЂ¦I think that would be bad. The depth of my masochism is not safe for me, I use other peopleвЂ™s guidelines to keep myself safe.

Somehow she went from wanting to help other people, to wanting to kill other people to save them the suffering.вЂќI crossed the line of thinking about killing someone to save them from suffering. She felt the only way to redeem herself was through service to others and she felt everyone wasВ better than her and she deserved pain. This fictional character was on the same path I am on. It is as if she is inside my mind. Re-reading it made me realize I am closer to her breaking point than 2 years ago.вЂњI identify with her so much. I wrote the post in 2014 and all of my thoughts still apply.

I would never harm someone else. Part of me knows that is irrational because I care too much about how other people feel. After all, they call it вЂњsadomasochismвЂќ, what if I am capable of sadism too?! What if, my self-injury (in all its forms: SIB, eating disorder, masochism, suicide attempts), is all that stops me from becoming a sadist? What if I AM evil?These thoughts make me think I should kill myself to protect everyone around me. IвЂ™m afraid of who I will become if I stop hurting myself.

One of our students goes there some week days. Despite keeping that response in mind, my fear of myself remains.A co-worker (Mark) got caught in a strange and potentially serious lie today.He worked in the after school program adjacent to, but not affiliated with,В the school. I got my response from her.

The guy who babysatВ him a few times.вЂќ My boss replied, pointing out Mark.Mom looked puzzled and said she didnвЂ™t know him and had never heard of him.WEIRD! Everyone is confused now. There is Mark!вЂќвЂњYou know, Mark. Mark was outside with his student on break and my boss said something like, вЂњOh look. My boss was chatting with Mom while they watched him play. Today his momВ came to schoolВ for an IEP meeting. Since then, Mark told us about various times when he babysat for the boy at home.В Mark went so far as to tell us about his bedroom and that his dad chewed tobacco.